Sunday, December 09, 2007
Thanksgiving Day phone calls
This happened to me on Thanksgiving day as I was working on dinner and stuff:
Cell phone: Ring! Ring! (Rochester, NY area code 585)
Rodrigo: I don't know this number. I am not going to answer.
A little later...
Cell phone: Ring! Ring! (Rochester, NY area code 585)
Rodrigo: WTF, I don't know this number. Leave a message already.
Cell phone text message: "He left. We need to talk. Call me!"
Rodrigo: WTF!!
A little later...
Cell phone: Ring! Ring! (Rochester, NY area code 585)
Rodrigo: OMG! What the hell!!! Let me answer... Hello?
Man: Hello?
Rodrigo: Yes?
Man: Is this Tom? This is Doug, Cinnamon's husband.
Rodrigo: I'm sorry, I'm not Tom.
Doug: I know it's you, this is Doug. We need to talk.
R: I'm not Tom, sorry...
Silence... Doug hangs up.
A little later....
Cell phone: Ring! Ring! (Rochester, NY area code 585)
R: I'm still not Tom...
D: Didn't you meet a girl down in Orlando a few weeks ago? She's from New York, heavy set.
R: No I did not.
D: You didn't have a rendez-vous with her?
R: I most certainly did not.
Silence... Doug hangs up again.
This dialogue repeats itself once more but this time:
R: I'm sorry, I did not sleep with Cinnamon. Not that it's any of your business but I'm gay!
D: HA! Well... umm... Who do you live with? Do you know a Tom?
R: I do not!
D: Hmmm... ok...
Silence... Doug hangs up again. Thanksgiving goes on without further interruptions until Saturday.
Cell phone: Ring! Ring! (Rochester, NY area code 585)
R: This is still not Tom!!!
D: HAHA! Hey man it's Doug. I just wanted to tell you what happened. My wife messed up the numbers. Your number is very close to Tom's!
R: Oh ok.
D: Man, my wife and I have been having problems. She flies down to Florida and f*cks her boyfriend from 12 years ago. I'm ready to come down there and beat the sh*t out of him! He's not a little guy but neither am I. I'm 6'2, 250lbs before my morning Cheerios.
R: Wow, yeah I would be upset too!
D: So yeah, I just wanted to tell you that and apologize for bugging you on Thanksgiving.
R: No problem, I understand. Good luck with everything.
D: Oh yeah, don't worry. Everything will be ok once I come down there and take care of Tom.
R: Alright, take care.
D: Have a nice life! Good luck with everything! Bye!